Suzy Snapper
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Thankful
It's that time of year again. Turkey Day.

Thanksgiving. Or the time of year we can reflect on what we are thankful for. I also usually try to give a thought or two to what I have accomplished (or harvested) so far this year.

Thankfulness. Well, that one's easy. Family. I am so thankful that my niece and I are so close. That each year she and I develop a relationship that is as close to sisters as I think I will ever find.

This year, though, I can add my other niece to that mix. S's sister, J. Younger than S by 2 years, she and I have been much more volatile in our relationship. We spent a few weeks travelling together in 2000 which, unfortunately, damaged things rather than the hoped for improvements. She was 16 at the time, and I was too nervous to let her out of my sight on the other side of the world. I don't think she spoke to me for a few years after that. But now, she's finally coming out of that...growing up, I guess. And I'm softening too. The funny thing is the more I see her, the more I realize she is me 15 years earlier. Maybe that's why we do this "oil and water" dance.

My parents. Each passing day is a gift. Each day I see them both become more aged and weaker and it terrifies me. I try to appreciate every moment I have, as I know each day is a gift now. On Friday night, we had a family dinner and it was one of those rare moments when everything was perfect. Dinner was fabulous, and we were all in such good moods that we laughed until our sides split. No one wanted to leave and have the night end. I drove home and it suddenly struck me. I was terrified that somehow that might have been one of the last nights like that. It truly scares me, living on this borrowed time.

I'm thankful that I have phenomenal friends. They accept me for me. I have friends I talk to every day, and friends I may speak to once a year, but I know they're there. This week, I reconnected with a friend I hadn't seen in over a year. We sat there wondering what had happened, but it was just life. Nothing more. True friendship is lifelong. Sometimes we'll go on separate paths, but inevitably it'll go back to the same one.

Not to mention thankful I didn't back away completely from blogging when things went sideways. I have a strong need to write, and this medium has not only opened me up to many wonderful, strong friends but also a wealth of knowledge as well. It allowed me to feed that need in me to write (although I do write outside of here as well), and also strengthened my resolve in many ways. I don't apologize for anything in here. If someone is offended by my feelings, comments or opinions, I only ask you to put yourself in my shoes. This is who I am. Good, bad or indifferent.

I'm thankful I had the courage to finally dig for the answers regarding my health. I hadn't really been asking the right questions or telling the right stories to my doctors for some time for the sheer reason that I didn't think I could face the answers. While it still does mean surgery, there is something infinitely rewarding about the words 'pain free'. Inconceivable at this point, but it's like the brightest white light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm also thankful for taking the situation earlier this year and turning it into something positive. Forgive me for being vague, but I'm still a little nervous about who reads this. It however, is one of my greatest accomplishments this year. Being able to rebuild a friendship out of ashes. He's a good guy, and that's all I can say right now.

I'm thankful that I am living in a country as wonderful as Canada. That for all it's problems, it is still the best place I could ever imagine. I am thankful that my military and that of my neighbour's is doing all it can right now to help maintain that.

So tonight as I go to my brother's house and watch the kids chew down on a turkey leg and the puppy, who is now being referred to as 'Princess P*sspot' chew on our socks as we sit at the table, I will be very thankful. I am truly blessed.

Sue
Vancouver, British Columbia
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A patriotic Canadian full of visions of a better Canada, random thoughts and a lot of hot air. Who am I? A struggling writer and photographer trapped in a corporate buyer's body. Steel shopping by day, and freeflowing prose by night. One day I hope to have the nights become my days, but am intimidated by the sheer amount of people who share my dream. So I read. A lot. I learn. A lot. I push myself. A lot. The world is a small place, and getting smaller every day. I'm proud to have friends in every corner of the earth, and abide by the old adage that there are no strangers, only friends we haven't met yet.



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