As I alluded to in my last post, I did receive an email from Q over the weekend.

It's funny how the words you always hoped to hear can have a terrifying effect rather than an exciting one.

He is well and living close to where he used to, although no longer with the family. He remembers every little details of his time in Canada and his memories of our time together are strong.

He hasn't found the ability to feel love again either.

His mom is still living, although in the photograph I found on the internet, I must admit that time hasn't been kind to her. I truly thought that was their grandmother in the picture. She has lived a difficult life, and her aged looks are a testiment to that . He strength through adversity was always something I admired - even if it went against what I wanted.

Unfortunately, it was his stepfather - a jovial, friendly man that is no longer with us. He passed of cancer only a short time ago. Heartbreakingly after he and Q had only begun to built a relationship after a tumultuous stretch at odds of each other.

Where do we go from here? Sadly, that's what's bothering me. I simply have no idea. I can't move there. He can't move here. So we sit again - checkmate.